In each moment of every day there is a nonverbal conversation happening between us and the world around us.
When we hear ‘nonverbal’, we usually think of physical gestures, facial expressions, and other ‘body language’.
But what about those moments when you just sense something about someone? A new friend you feel like you know. Warning bells ringing even though nothing threatening has happened. Or someone saying one thing but you can tell they don’t mean it or won’t follow through. Their insides and their outsides aren’t matched up.
Some of the cues you’re picking up are facial expressions and other physical cues... and a lot of what you’re sensing is energy; a person’s ‘vibe’.
Like a tuning fork, your system starts resonating with theirs in ways that you then give meaning to- familiar, safe, scary, friendly, kindred spirits, etc.
If we don’t understand the language of energy, then we have this conversation unconsciously- like sleep talking, perhaps?
Those are the moments we go with it (or talk ourselves out of believing those initial instincts) only to ‘wake up’ however long down the line wondering how we got here (and why we’re ‘here’ again; because there’s a strong chance the pattern we fell into is an old one and we’ve been in a similar situation before).
*OR* we can learn the language of energy and get to be more conscious, active participants in these conversations.
Ya’ll- this is the key.
It’s not a magic trick. Nor is it a quick-fix. It is, however, totally possible, very real, and is one of the most effective things I’ve found for creating sustainable transformation in all areas of my life.
Ready to tap into your bone-deep wisdom and tune up your life?
I’m so excited for you. Let’s do it.
living in the world rather than on it... what does that mean?
How do we live in the world rather than on it?
For me that’s a question of ‘belonging.’
What comes up in your body when you read or hear the word
Belonging
?
Many of us have few places where we truly experience unconditional belonging.
The kind that says, “all of you is welcome here.”
The kind that is trusting of our own wholeness and its ability to be loved, accepted, enough.
Many of us experienced a wound (or many) that told us some part of us was too much, too wild, unsafe, or made us a threat (or target).
In those moments, we never stopped trying to belong - we need other people, community, family, networks of support - to survive and thrive. It’s just that suddenly our belonging became manipulative - we got good at figuring out who we needed to be to be accepted and squeezing ourselves into those postures, clothes, speech patterns, habits… ignoring when and how it hurt.
To do that, we had to become numb. We had to put others before ourselves. We had to be constantly on alert and on guard. We had to become an observer before we could be an experiencer.
And so we began to live on the world, rather than in it.
Living in the world is sensual, embodied, wild. It’s being so whole that we can meet others as they are. It’s knowing we belong to the Earth and everything on it - a trust that comes from the inside as equally as it comes from the outside.
It happens internally, and it gets reinforced and strengthened in healthy community.
Are you 'healing' to be 'normal'?
‘Normal’ is made up.
Stop trying to ‘heal’ yourself into becoming it.
You are meant to be divergent and emergent.
The richness of life is added to by the sum of all of your parts.
A field of wildflowers is not a monoculture. Society shouldn’t be either.
We are more resilient in our variations. In our diversity. In our layers of complexity.
If you are healing, I hope you’re healing to wholeness. If you’re unlearning, I hope you’re unlearning to acceptance of the rejected. If you’re re-tuning, I hope you’re attuning to Love and the moment-to-moment expressions of your human-Spirit’s truth.
No co-signers needed.
eating some humble pie and continuing to grow
When I finished my yoga teacher training, I made it my mission to show up as Love. I know how powerful a healing force Love is and I believe it’s our true nature.
Love, I knew, was what would change the world.
Time passed and I would find myself feeling exhausted by how deeply I cared and how much I loved. And I kept finding my personal relationships strange and strained. It felt like I was loving people in the wrong ways.
Sound familiar?
I didn’t consciously choose to start learning about the subtle body and energetic medicine- it just happened. My gut and feet took me there and then there I was.
It was utterly humbling to realize how out of alignment I still was, even with everything I knew, even with the best of intentions.
This next phase of my re-tuning journey went deep and was messy. But it was also the next step in bringing me from knowing better into truly doing better.
Now I don’t have to consciously show up as Love, because I am it. I still care deeply, but with mutually supportive boundaries. I make mistakes and embrace mess and healthy conflict as fuel for more Love. I am more tuned into myself and so I’m more able to hear others. I’m no longer afraid to be human (well, most days).
No matter how much ‘work’ you’ve done, you haven’t arrived- not because you aren’t whole and healed, but because life happens and, like a piano, you will need periodic tuning.
Is your life mirroring to you that something is out of sync, disharmonious? Are your intentions and your impact not quite lined up? Are you still feeling like you have to try... at everything?
Let’s talk. 💚
"life is pain, Highness..."
“Life is pain, Highness. Any one who says differently is selling something.” (William Goldman - Princess Bride)
Life is also pleasure and beauty and wonder and grief.
Humans naturally want to move away from what feels hard and painful- how useful! That’s probably helped keep us alive!
But it also weakens us. What good are muscles you don’t ever use?
There’s healthy discomfort and unhealthy discomfort. If your wellness and/or spiritual practices aren’t helping you learn to discern the difference and build capacity for the good one, you’re missing out.
You can’t heal your way out of being human. Being human is what you’re here for.
What you seek isn’t somewhere else. It’s right here. In this moment.
The answers aren’t out but through. You can tune up by tuning in.